Gummi Bears TV Show To be Rebooted as Cinematic Franchise; No Word on ReBoot Reboot.

Disney's Adventures of the Gummi Bears, image via Disney

Disney’s Adventures of the Gummi Bears, image via Disney

DISNEYLAND, FL — Disney, the company that is actually making good products out of your childhood instead of turning them over to Michael Bay or Zack Snyder to be turned into grey-toned explosion fests, has just announced plans to launch a new movie franchise.  This time, instead of buying up a once-great property being poorly managed and turning it around, Disney has decided to reach back into its own bag of intellectual property and build a new franchise out of one own concepts.  Having apparently reached blindly into this bag, Disney has announced that they will be launching a 7-movie franchise based on The Adventures of the Gummi Bears.

Like everything good about pop culture, Gummi Bears came out of the late 1980s.  It was originally an animated show loosely based on the candy of the same name.  The story featured a family of anthropomorphic bears brewing “magical” potions from the local forest flora.  They were frequently in conflict with the rapaciously evil forces of Duke Igthorn, who sought to use the Bears’ magical potions in his bid to overthrow the King of Dunwyn, a fictional medieval English kingdom.  Much of the plot centered around the ongoing drug war over the Gummi Bears’ “gummieberry juice”, which the evil Duke Igthorn wanted to use to empower himself and his ogre army with superstrength.  Duke Igthorn was definitely a junkie.

“We’re not sure how long the super-hero gravy train is going to keep on rolling,” said one Disney executive.  “We want to line ourselves up for success further down the line.  And this show featured ogres and talking bears and super-powered knights.  Everyone is going to love it.”

Little is known about the franchises tone or who will be tapped to direct.  Industry watchers have reported that watching factories is very boring and so they are excited about any new movies coming out.

Also, here’s a link to a guy playing the theme song on his ukulele.


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