Following a string of unfortunate deaths, legendary entertainers Mick Jagger and David Bowie have come together to issue this solemn reminder: always look both ways before dancing in the street.
“It’s a terrible tragedy, and we want to properly honor the victims,” mumbled Mick Jagger, “but let’s not forget the real victims: me.
“When things like these happen, people are very quick to blame artists, as though we intended people to get hurt for listening our music. That’s simply not true. We just wanted their money.”
Individuals in Philadelphia, New Orleans, Motor City, and all around the world have been injured and killed as they took to dancing in the street, and while Jagger and Bowie did not write the song or perform it originally, their version and their positions as music icons make them targets for criticism. As such, they are responding now, hoping more senseless deaths can be prevented.
“It’s simple, really,” said Goblin King David Bowie. “Look both ways, make certain you have a clear path, always dance with a buddy, and you can dance home safely.”