Sometimes when I’m bored I will peruse IO sites for games by small or indie developers. It’s a great way to break up the cookie cutter monotony being hocked through Steam, and see what ideas, graphics, controls, etc., are being created by brilliant people who don’t have a huge budget. I have found some enjoyable games this way and I’m often pleasantly surprised by the quality.
On one particular day, however, I stumbled into a slightly stranger than normal corner of the internet. Among the bunnies planting a garden, and heroes trying to solve puzzles, I found a game which proves Internet Rule #34 true. (If you can imagine it, it exists on the internet… as porn.)
“Stick Shift is an auto-erotic night-driving game about pleasuring a gay car.”
At face value, that is exactly what this game is. (Though I wouldn’t necessarily call it porn.)
There is no human nudity in this game at all. But there are plenty of hot naked gay cars, big swollen exposed gear sticks, and oozing tail exhaust pipes.
The controls are simple and the whole experience is just as silly as the description makes it sound. The basic principles are stroking the gear selector and changing gears to bring your automobile to climax. The end result is of course a cargasm.
“Why would someone create this?” you might ask. It was a burning question in my mind both before and after playing the game. I found the answer in the form of a blog post by its creator, Robert Yang. If you recognize the name, it’s because he has the most banned titles on Twitch. His other works include Rinse & Repeat, a male shower simulator, and Hurt Me Plenty, where you spank the shit out of some guy. I urge you to check out his post here. Armed with this new information, the game makes a little more sense.
Mr. Yang talks about the idea of activism through self-expression. He cites the famous Stonewall Riots where LGBT participants flamboyantly resisted the police. He cites a study where gay and non-cis persons have claimed unfair or even brutal treatment by those who are suppose to protect and serve. He even added an alternate ending based on said study, where you are interrupted and pulled over by two very unamused cops. Assumedly, for jacking off your car in public, though I’m not sure that’s a real crime. You can even blow kisses at the vehicular cock-blockers in an act of defiance.
I am pleased that instead of just making a gross game for weird horny people, a lot of thought and research was put into Stick Shift. But to be honest, I believe the activist message isn’t advertised well enough. The download page itself truly markets the game as a humorous sexual encounter with a car.
There is no controller support and the average run time is 4-7 minutes. But you can name your price for the download, so you can easily get your money’s worth.
I personally didn’t get anything out of the playthrough; unless you count braggin’ rights that I am able to take care of ALL my car’s needs. In the words of one commenter this game is “whacked and complete balls”. However, if you have ever fantasized about giving your Jetta a hand-job, this could be an entertaining game for you to check out.
Released July 2015
Playable on PC as an IO
Pairs well with … water. Don’t drink and drive.