Trumptonia, USA — Before an audience of almost dozens of supporters, current Republican presidential candidate frontrunner, master orator, and award-winning jam maker Donald Trump made an address in honor of yesterday’s holiday.
“I join the rest of the country in honoring and thanking our vets for all they’ve done and all they continue to do,” he said. “They vaccinate our kittens; they deworm our schnauzers; they put our beloved race horses to sleep. So, with my handsome and nimble fingers, I salute all veterinarians who have served this country.”
He went on:
“This administration hasn’t done enough to help our veterinarians. That is why, when I am elected president, I will do more for veterinarians than any other president in the history of Presidents and veterinarians has ever done for any veterinarians with a plan, the details of which i have not made up yet, but I guarantee it’ll be great, because I made it, and I only make great things.”
He then unveiled a tiny model of a solid gold high rise kitty condominium and served refreshments out of kitty bowls.