Graphic Dudity LIVE Christmas Episode

A few nights ago Brandon and I did a live episode of Graphic Dudity for Christmas on his Facebook cosplay page.  We discussed the Men Vs Cosplay Calendar, Top 5 Christmas Movies, Rogue One and our read list.  Check it out if you missed it!

Graphic Dudity talks Suicide Squad

The much anticipated Suicide Squad film dropped this past weekend.  It both bombed with critics and broke box office records, so which side will we take?  We also continue our segments on Pokemon GO, Top 5s and new segments Speed Round and Read List.

 

Graphic Dudity Episode 1: Convention Etiquette

In a continued effort to bring you thoughtful original content, TMS is proud (possibly indifferent) to present the first episode of Graphic Dudity by our own TMS staffers Josh X Henderson and Brandon Meseure!

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Where Do the Turtles Go From here?

A week after it opened, 2014’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was deemed a success and given a sequel, which opened last week, taking the top of the weekend’s box office. Having recovered from the previous movie’s many shortcomings, we can’t help but wonder, What’s next for the Turtles? With their gallery of rogues quickly expanding and a deep backlog of baddies from years of comics and cartoons, there’s no shortage of storylines to explore.

 

*SPOILERS AHEAD!  Proceed with CAUTION!!!*

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Harrison Ford Dies Performing Stunt For IJ5; Expected To Recover

Hollywood, Mars – As principal photography began on Steven Spielberg’s latest nostalgia driven cash grab/passion project, Indiana Jone5 and the Hunt for More Money, action star and historical artifact Harrison Ford was apparently killed performing a dangerous stunt for the film.

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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Feature Films Ranked

Being born in the same great year as our heroes in a half-shell, I have been feeling the turtle power for as far back as I can remember.  TMNT figures ruled my toy chest, the original cartoon series ruled the TV every Saturday morning and I had several trips to see Secret of the Ooze in theaters, even though trips to the movies were rare for me as I child.

But not everyone’s life has been as great as mine.  Some of you might be new to TMNT fandom, so here they are, my ranking of all the TMNT movies to date.  Which, bee tee dubs, is the correct ranking.

#6  Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)

There is very little to like about the first installment of the latest run of TMNT films.  I can appreciate that they tried to go a new way, but my laundry list of complains of why I don’t like this film is seriously a mile long.   The only reason you should watch this movie is to get an understanding of what’s to come in Out of the Shadows.  There is very little to like here.

#5  Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III

Also a pretty lousy TMNT film.  Very disliked by fans and critics alike.  I only rank it slightly above TMNT 2014 because they at least tried to keep it tied to Japan and the turtles mythos.  It also featured the return of Casey Jones.  Plus, the time travel story reminds me of the best video game of all time, Turtles in Time!

#4  The Secret of the Ooze

This was my favorite as a kid.  Lots of laugh, a little brighter than the first film and, of course. Ninja Rap.  Looking back on it now it’s obvious it was rushed and is unintentionally a Gremlins 2: The New Batch, which was purposefully a parody of itself.  It’s still a lot fun though, and thankfully saw the departure of Corey Feldman as Donatello.

#3  Out of the Shadows

The latest film about our lean mean green incredible team just came out today and it was a major step in the right direction from the last Nickelodeon film.  It was a pretty major toss up for me to choose this one for #2 or #3 and what it really came down to is that while being vastly superior to the 2014 film, Out of the Shadows still suffers from a lot of the same pitfalls.  Ugly, bulky turtle design, Megan Fox as April, Tony Shalhoub as Splinter, overblown & unrealistic action scenes, among other things.  OOTS did jump a lot of the hurdles the first film tripped over, but still couldn’t finish the race.

#2  TMNT

 

What’s nice about 2007’s TMNT is that we are entering an established world.  We know who these guys are, we know their story and most of the supporting cast.  So let’s move on to the story.  And a fresh story we haven’t seen before.  A lot of the bad reviews criticized the story and plot as muddled and underdeveloped but I disagree.  I felt it was a breath of fresh air.  And the action and direction were fantastic.  Not overblown, just right.  It brought us so many cool things like Leo in the jungle, Leo fighting Raph as the Nightwatcher (you gotta see who wins), and a film where Karai actually does something!  The supporting cast is filled out by fantastic voice actors while the principal cast of the turtles falls very flat.  And that’s really about my own gripe.  As far as the turtles being animated, this is where they looked their best.  Not too cartoony, but not… grotesque.

#1  Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

As an adult I furthered my fandom beyond the series, the toys and movies into the comics, where it all began.  And that’s why I rate the first film as the best.  It is truest to it’s comic origins, with the story lifted almost straight from some of the earliest issues.  It’s dark and mysterious, while still being humorous.  We get our first look into the world of these fascinating characters (and the origin makes sense!)  We  get the best portrayal and appearance of Casey Jones.  It is the gold standard all the films have been striving for since it was released.   And with as far as CGI has come, the turtle suits still almost look more believable to me.  Plus, Sam Rockwell.

Also, while these are not feature films, I highly recommend watching the animated TV film Turtles Forever and the documentary Turtle Power.  These would have probably ranked after Ooze and before TMNT, perspectively, had they been feature films.

Do you agree with my list?  Disagree?  I don’t care.  Go fight on on reddit if you want be a jerk about someone’s personal opinions.

 

Shocking New Game of Thrones Theory!

George RR Martin is declining to comment on a huge new theory about his long-running and hugely successful book series A Song of Ice and Fire and its TV adaptation Game of Thrones.  The theory posits that Westeros is actually a post-apocalyptic Earth, one which describes the fate of a Trump-led America.

The central thesis of the theory posits that the Wall, guarded by the Night’s Watch, is actually the remnants of the wall Donald Trump has idiotically proposed to build along America’s southern border.

Though this completely turns the Wall’s origin (per the books) on its head, there is precedent for not trusting the textual evidence at face value.  The inhabitants of Westeros’s Seven Kingdoms don’t always know their own history and much of it may in fact be little more than myths.  It is not impossible to believe that the original purpose of the Wall has been lost in the thousands of years since its construction.

According to the theory, after Trump’s presidential victory and construction of the Wall, America inevitably descended into anarchy and chaos.  The descendants of Trumpmerica became what the Seven Kingdoms know as Wildlings.  This theory argues that such a descent into barbarism likely took about a month under Trump’s deranged rule.  Those nations that would eventually become the Seven Kingdoms of A Song and Ice and Fire, recognized the danger and began manning Trump’s Wall themselves, turning it into a bastion against the orange maniac’s failed state.

Over the centuries the land that had once been the United States of America became a devastated and empty wasteland divided up by warring clans and tribes.  The White Walkers, again according to this theory, are actually direct descendants of the clearly inhuman Trump himself.